How to deal with a bad breakup?
Time is a big healer. The feelings may never fade away completely, but it surely will reduce to an extent where you can let someone else take that place, in future.
When boyfriend broke up, all he said was – ‘Lets be really good friends‘.
As time passed, realization struck that, it was not a statement he wanted to stick by. The distance crept in, conversations ceased to happen, tears dried and it all just went downhill from there. Years of memories that were once shared did not matter anymore. We were now, two strangers leading lives of our own, walking different paths.
We had stopped speaking. The feelings slowly started reducing.
New people walked in, new friends were made. The memories started blurring. Though the mind kept replaying the glimpses of the million beautiful moments of the past. Though the heart ached for the feeling of being loved again. Things had changed and life was going to be different from now on. This was a fact that could not be denied or overseen.
Things don’t always work the way we want them to. We absolutely have no control over some situations. But we do have the control over how we feel when we face certain problems. Why not take it positively and move ahead in life?
What if they were not our true love? What if there is someone else we are meant to be with? What if things happened for the good?
Broken hearts are capable of healing themselves with time. People who have walked away, will also stop mattering after a while.
As they say –
“Sometimes it takes a heartbreak to shake us awake & help us see we are worth so much more than we’re settling for.”
― Mandy Hale
Believe that you deserve the best and that the best is yet to come. Keep moving ahead without looking back. Find things you love to do. Keep yourself busy. Learn to live for yourself. Love may strike again when you least expect it. Just stay positive and hopeful of the fact that its going to be all sunshine and rainbows here on.
One Comment
Anonymous
Firstly, I want to appreciate the effort you are putting in reaching out to others who may have faced a similar situation as you. I am sorry someone broke your heart. Thinking you had finally found someone that would last forever, which is a ‘part’ of your happiness is the best kind of feeling.
I want to make it clear, I am only being a critic in order to extend your empathy to the reality and hoping my thoughts from my experience are reflected.
I do not really believe in the ‘time heals everything’, but I do believe in things taking its course for their own good. Maybe it was in the best interests of the both that we are not together. It has been more than 4 years since we stopped talking to each other and yet, the reveries keep coming back to me once in a while. Keeping myself busy to avoid them works only until there is just a slightest provocation and I have to fight hard against my mind to stop the depressing feelings.
I came to accept the fact that true love does not exist. Or even if it exists, it is not the idealistic love that can last forever. I also believe your broken heart can never be completely healed but hopefully, just stitched back and held together by someone who understands your reality. To accept the fact that it is not true is the toughest because it shakes up your entire belief system.
I still believe we would have kept each other happy. Maybe she was the true love. Maybe no one will ever be take her place. Maybe it was the state of our mind that made us go separate ways, maybe it was a stupid mistake. But whatever happened, we have to live with it. Even if it is the hardest thing you have ever faced. Even if it means you have locked up your feelings because she was the only one you could share your true thoughts and emotions with. I can only hope she is happier than when she was with me and I am not courageous enough to verify that. She will always be the special one, even if I will never hear from her.
Our belief systems are primarily centered around our own happiness. The person you loved, believed (hopefully) that he was happy with you and you with him. Your beliefs may not completely change, but nothing is constant. Like time, the belief is also a construct we have wrapped our heads around. And all it can do is flow from one point to another. However, the core belief can stay the same based on your strength to hold it tight. I like the positive attitude you have in you in spite of the harsh reality. I really wish you stay in your sunshine and rainbow even when there is a storm and I am pretty sure someone lucky will walk past by you and find abode in you happy place. 🙂