But life experience is a lot like birthday cake — best when it’s shared. 🎂 So this year, we decided to reach out to you, our readers, for even more advice across every decade of life.

And let us tell you — you delivered. We spent hours poring through advice from people in their teens all the way up to their seventies, grateful for all you had to share. Some of you even gave advice for years you have not yet reached, and they read like beautiful manifestations and affirmations of what you want for your life and for others. 

We selected some of our favorites below, but know that every tidbit of wisdom was received with warm hearts (and some teary eyes). Thank you, friends, for making the internet a kinder place, and for making aging seem a lot less scary.

Have your own piece of advice? We’d love to hear about it in the comments! ✨

Table of contents

• Advice for your teenage years
• Advice for your 20s
• Advice for your 30s
• Advice for your 40s
• Advice for your 50s
• Advice for your 60s
• Advice for your 70s (and up!)

Advice for your teenage years

“Trust in yourself and what you know. Don’t feel like you need to fit into a mold or what everyone else says you should be into, look like, dress like, etc. Let your inner voice guide you, and when in doubt, read some books!” —Ifrah A, 20s

“Meditate.” —Colette G, 20s

“Build self-confidence through keeping promises to yourself while you still have a ton of energy! Trust yourself to follow through on doing the things you deserve, like moving your body, eating whole foods, spending time with friends, and everything that makes life fun.” —Anonymous, 20s

“People aren’t thinking about you nearly as much as you think they are.” —Rachel T, 30s

“I don’t know who started the rumor that women need to be hairless to be attractive, but men don’t care. Anytime I’ve mentioned not being waxed or shaved the answer is always ‘so?’ Do what you want, it’s your beautiful body.” —Jacqui D, 30s

“Keep tweezers and wax far away from your eyebrows.” —Hanna S, 30s

“Slow down. You’ll grow up faster than you think and there are so many experiences to be had right now. Savor the time. Learn from the good and the bad. The intensity of your emotions are a gift, don’t ignore them. Sit with them. Consider them. And never be afraid to ask for help. You are loved.” —Laurie N, 40s

“Give yourself some grace and learn about how hormones impact your experience and perception. Be kind to yourself. Enjoy the freedom of your teens while respecting it and take into account how future you may be impacted by present choices.” —Elizabeth C, 40s

“Your parents are on your side. Your family is always going to be there. Value your time with them.” —Manjusha G, 40s

“As much as you want to moan and groan when your parents start acting ‘all young and silly,’ LET THEM. Life flies by REALLY fast and reliving teenage moments to them feels like yesterday.” —Nic K, 40s

“Find a mentor that you can share feelings with and ask important questions Don’t worry about not being in the cool gang, you will find your groove and tribe many times over throughout your life” —Sandi C, 50s

“Find your hidden gem. What makes you tick? Claim it. Find a good therapist. Go at least 4 times then you’ll have the rapport in place for when you need it. Avoid alcohol. Don’t ask why…just wait.” —Lisa PS, 50s

“Be open and learn from your elders. They have life experience which turns into wisdom as it ages.” —Amy S, 60s

“Oh darlings, just hold on tight. It’s all so confusing and wonderful all at the same time. Choose your friends carefully and don’t be afraid to be yourself and love that person.” —Dianne S, 70s

“Oh darlings, just hold on tight. It’s all so confusing and wonderful all at the same time. Choose your friends carefully and don’t be afraid to be yourself and love that person.”

Dianne S, 70s

Advice for your 20s

“Find something you enjoy that you can go to when in tough times.” —Anonymous, 20s

“You should not compete with others, drink way less, and ask a lot of questions. Also, suffering in relationships is not love. Leave.” —Mariana CR, 20s

“Know your worth and that it’s okay to make changes. You don’t have to be locked into a path and follow that to its end. You can shift and change course. Your skills and time are valuable, never let anyone else undermine that.” —Ifrah A, 20s

“You definitely don’t have to know your next step (your 20s are for figuring yourself out), but you should have a strong set of values by your mid-20s that guide the decisions you make. That way, you’ll end up in the right place, even if you don’t know what that place is right now.” —Anonymous, 20s

“Be intentional about your relationships, learn to invest in those people that also invest in you. Continue to love others. Go at the pace you’re called to go, you don’t need to get married right away, or have kids right away, or get a house right away. Everyone has their own pace.” —Shine R, 20s

“Celebrate your friends’ accomplishments, big or small. A new apartment, an engagement, leaving a crappy job…Be happy for the people around you!” —Celia W, 20s

“Everything will be constantly changing during your 20s, so try your best to build a relationship with yourself that can ground you when things become confusing or overwhelming. Get to know yourself (and your inner child, very important!), meditate, move your body, do more of what you like, say no to the things you don’t and try not to take life too seriously.” —Iris G, 20s

“You can change. And change again. And change again.” —Farrin M, 30s

“Have fun! Make mistakes and learn from them!” —Jen K, 30s

“Approach this decade with ferocious curiosity” —Kimberly H, 30s

“Sexual health is important, get your pap smear every year, get tested for STDs, and make sure your partner does as well.” —Jacqui D, 30s

“Everyone is struggling. It’s not just you.” —Hanna S, 30s

“Don’t turn down road-trips or special moments with one or both of your parents. You’ll regret it if you turn down some sweet bonding time.” —Anonymous, 30s

“Life is long: don’t rush to work and have a stable life. Don’t obsess over money, clout and status. Dance, cook, have sex, do drugs, stay at home, sleep in the streets, do whatever except obsess over work and money.” —Elena S, 30s

“Even though everyone says you should find a career in something you love, not everyone should. Depending on that about which you are passionate for your livelihood can take the joy out of it. Find a job you enjoy, one that is fulfilling, but it’s okay to keep your passions for yourself.” —Laurie N, 40s

“Be kind to yourself. Learn how to enjoy spending time on your own.” —Elizabeth C, 40s

“You will not be the same person 20 years, don’t take it too seriously.” —Michelle L, 40s

“Eat healthy, drink water, take care of your skin and get exercise, and build healthy routines, rituals, and habits—your 40+ age self will massively thank you.” —Nic K, 40s

“Work on yourself in little ways (with that therapist from your teens :). Start saving money. Start thinking about needs vs wants. Kiss a lot of different people. Say nice things to yourself in the form of affirmations. If you have a shitty mom or dad, find new role models. Journal. Travel to as many countries as you can. Begin in this decade.” —Lisa P, 50s

“My 20s were the toughest decade for me, trying to find my niche. Explore. Try different jobs. Live in different parts of the world. Be open to learning more about yourself. I was drawn to Tarot cards and astrology to understand myself. Therapy never hurts.” —Amy S, 60s

“Get out of your head and into the world, experience is much better when you feel it with your heart.” —Susan M, 60s

“Fall in love with everyone.” —Dianne S, 70s

“Get out of your head and into the world, experience is much better when you feel it with your heart.”

Susan M, 60s

Advice for your 30s

“Develop an awareness of how you feel and follow it. Drink your water, wash and moisturize your face. Quit that job. Find a new one thing and follow it like a rabbit down a hole.” —Farrin M, 30s

“Don’t panic if you seem to be doing things later than everyone else. We all grow and discover at different rates. At the same time, don’t let fear hold you back. You are so much stronger than you think.” —Jessie C, 30s

“This is where transformation happens. This is when you learn about yourself more than ever. Allow it, embrace it and be proud of how far you’ve come” —Allison R, 30s

“Glass of water before bed. Glass of water before morning coffee. Now that does a body good.” —Hanna S, 30s

“If you’re not happy, make a change until you are. Life is too short to spend living someone else’s narrative. Nothing matters as much as being true to yourself. So do the things that make you happy and distance yourself from those that don’t.” —Cris A, 30s

“Trust your gut but don’t always do as your experience tells you: take chances, risk things, cry a lot.” —Elena S, 30s

“I felt like this was the time when I started to settle into my being, my life, and my future but that wasn’t quite right. We should constantly learn, change, evolve, and expand. From our souls to our bodies to our surroundings, seek growth. Surround yourself with love and people who nourish you. Find your community (if you haven’t already) and build upon your foundation.” —Laurie N, 40s

“This is the stage for some belly button gazing and doing some self work.” —Michelle L, 40s

“Be patient with your partner — you are together for a marathon, not a sprint.” —Manjusha G, 40s

“Perfect the art of being attentive and buying quality gifts people will love to receive. Invest in a quality mattress and quality bedding — sleep is important and you best love being in the place you do it every night” —Nic K, 40s

“Take care of yourself, this includes your: feet, mental health, and physical strength. Also, if you’re interested in starting a family and haven’t yet, it can still be done — admittedly, having my one and only baby at 40, I can tell you that you can do it, just know your body can struggle more if you’re not actively working towards improving yourself (exercise, etc.).” —Rebecca W, 40s

“Be kind with your changing self. Life is happening now. You don’t have to be perfect to be accepted or loved.” —Marie C, 40s

“There is no perfect time to start a family.” —Michelle Q, 40s

“Stop trying to be happy all the time. Strive for contentment and appreciate happy when it happens.” —Regina M, 50s

“Stay true to yourself. This is the decade when you might erode/lose who you are at your core due to life changes, partnerships, children, and peer pressure.” —Cathy V, 50s

“Travel. Travel. Travel. Develop grounding daily practices. Trust. Begin investing. Learn new things. Read all the time. Be a good friend. Find your inner wisdom. Talk to her regularly. Keep checking in with your therapist. If they suck, definitely find a better one.” —Lisa PS, 50s

“Eat well, watch alcohol consumption.” —JA, 60s

“Don’t feel that you have to take on everything. Job, marriage, parenthood. You’ve still got some time, you’re still growing. No unnecessary pressure.” —Dianne S, 70s

“Trust. Begin investing. Learn new things. Read all the time. Be a good friend. Find your inner wisdom. Talk to her regularly.”

Lisa PS, 50s

Advice for your 40s

“If you’re lucky, you still have as many years ahead as behind. What an amazing time to exist. The knowledge you have earned over the last few decades can make this the most beautiful time in your life so far. This can be the decade of comfort and exploration. You’ve likely established yourself in one way or another. Maybe it’s time to lean into that or maybe it’s time to renew yourself. It’s also time to make sure you’re taking care of your body and mind. Feed and exercise both in a way that rejuvenates. You will be rewarded for that love.” —Laurie N, 40s

“Take care of your skin (full body), do more of what you love, and go to bed by 10 — or find a way to get all your sleep.” —Anonymous, 40s

“Be kind to yourself. You are still so young and don’t forget it. Appreciate your body.” —Elizabeth C, 40s

“If you haven’t started already, spend as much time and collect as much wisdom you can from the elders in your life you’re close to. […] Your 30s will have flown by and your 40s go even faster. Stop filling your life with clothes, make-up and other material things. Spend the money on trips and memories and experiences, and savings.” —Nic K, 40s

“You still have plenty of time ahead of you. Make this time yours and not others’!” —Marie C, 40s

“Remember that even those people in your life that you trust fully will eventually cause hurt to you through betrayal, dishonesty, or just plain bullying (yes, bullying is still a thing). Having the grace and strength to get through these challenges are built throughout your earlier decades. Don’t lose who you are because those of peer pressure.” —Cathy V, 50s

“Trust your inner wisdom. Claim your voice. Keep traveling. Nurture friendships. Hire help. Limit alcohol. Keep your practices strong. Give time to your community. Take your neighbor’s garbage cans in and out. Travel. Volunteer in another country. Keep learning. Get a dog. Write. Teach others what you know best. Be kind. Tip a lot. Save and spend. Do both equally.” —Lisa PS, 50s

“I felt my strongest, internally in my 40s. Sex is great. Go for it.” —Amy S, 60s

“Buckle up. Contribute to 401k, patience, enjoy life while kids are still home.” —JA, 60s

“Ok now you are a big person….an adult. You may think you were before but most people shouldn’t have made life altering decisions before now.” —Dianne S, 70s

Advice for your 50s

“I have just turned 50 and although I’ve just moved countries, changed my career, learning a new language, I’m still searching out things to do, places to go….. live life to the full. I’m focused on my health because I want to be fit and independent for as long as I can. I make sure people I love and my well-being are at the forefront of my life. Looking back I probably have only one wish which is that I probably should have invested more but it’s only a minor practical thing that I can say from hindsight.” —Sandi C, 50s

“Continue to learn every day, especially through younger and older people. Be open to evolution and keep in mind that the world is so incredibly different than when you were growing up. Practice patience with those who feel like their old ways are the best ways but also free yourself from their company when you realize that their values and philosophy about living are completely contrary to yours.” —Cathy V, 50s

This is a good time. If you’ve taken care of yourself, your body is probably perfect. So is your mind. You have gained knowledge and experience enough to give good sold information and advise. It’s a decade to reevaluate and look at some of the things you wanted to do but didn’t. If you are a parent you can start to have a meaningful adult relationship with your children.” —Dianne S, 70s

Advice for your 60s

“WOWOWOW…how did I get here and what is next? I spent too many years surviving, sometimes thriving, sometimes crying, but 60 wasn’t on my radar. Dream of your next life early on.” —Susan M, 60s

“60s are a time to reflect and think about the person you are. If you’re retired and worked all of your life you most probably didn’t take the time to tweak any emotional flaws that may have been their all your life. It’s time to sit back any really look at the way you are, or not loving yourself. It’s time to stop giving any of your energy to criticism, negativity or judgment to yourself and to people and things around you. It’s time to realize that what you think is who you are. Be soft, be accepting. We’re all, including you, doing the best we can.” —Dianne S, 70s

Advice for your 70s (and up!)

“It’s really a lovely decade. BTW, I forgot to say all this time you should have been moving and breathing! If you have, and you’re healthy, enjoy every minute. It’s one of the best times in your life. Spend time being kind, generous. Laugh a lot. Stay mindful, love every moment this life continues to give you. Being is a privilege and an honour. Don’t ever take it for granted. Love yourself. See beauty in the world. And look in the mirror every day and tell that reflection looking back how wonderful they are. The world is Divine and so are you.” —Dianne S, 70s

“Love yourself. See beauty in the world. And look in the mirror every day and tell that reflection looking back how wonderful they are. The world is Divine and so are you.”

Dianne S, 70s

Emily McGowan is the Editorial Director at The Good Trade. She studied Creative Writing and Business at Indiana University, and has over ten years of experience as a writer and editor in sustainability and lifestyle spaces. Since 2017, she’s been discovering and reviewing the top sustainable home, fashion, beauty, and wellness products so readers can make their most informed decisions. Her editorial work has been recognized by major publications like The New York Times and BBC Worklife. You can usually find her in her colorful Los Angeles apartment journaling, playing with her cat, or crafting. Say hi on Instagram or follow along with her Substack, Pinky Promise.

The post We Asked Our Readers For Advice On Aging By Decade — Here’s What You Had To Say appeared first on The Good Trade.

“We rehearsed every Monday, and when I first joined, I really needed that structure.”

What’s my obsession with Mondays, you ask? A couple of years ago, I decided to join a community choir in Chelsea. We rehearsed every Monday, and when I first joined, I really needed that structure. I was clouded by depression (which I later found out was due to an acne medication I was taking), and my remote job only made me feel more isolated. 

Music has always been intertwined with my DNA, as tangled up in it as corded headphones at the bottom of your bag (a lost art, right?). My dad plays Chopin on the piano like it’s as easy as Hot Cross Buns; my mom’s voice rivals an angel’s. So as soon as I could sit on the piano bench without sliding off, I was taking lessons. Then I married the keyboard to the vocal chord, taking voice lessons, singing in select choirs, and even sometimes playing out with my dad. 

So when I needed something to lift me out of my melancholy, community choir seemed like just the thing. And it was. For a while. 

But then I started to get burnt out by the whole “every Monday” thing. I couldn’t say yes to other plans, or even have the option of doing nothing on what is famously the most draining day of the week. The commute to choir was lengthy, almost an hour each way, made more hectic by rush hour, near-certain train delays, and the anarchic bedlam that is the Times Square subway transfer. I spent most of the rehearsal not focusing on the music, but impatiently checking my phone to see how close we were to the end. 

“I started to get burnt out by the whole ‘every Monday’ thing. I couldn’t say yes to other plans, or even have the option of doing nothing.”

So, I thought about quitting. And then not quitting. Over, and over, and over again. I imagined how calm I’d feel having a Monday evening with no obligations. But that fantasy would be swiftly shattered, or at least fractured, when I would think about Betty, the older woman in the tenor section who always smiled when I walked in. Or the two women I sat next to in the soprano section, and how we’d snicker between measures, the adult version of passing notes in class. And Dusty the golden doodle, who was adamant that belly rubs were far more important than the SATB arrangement of “Smooth Operator.” 

Because, of course, choir was about singing. But I can sing in the shower. The people (and dogs) made the choir worth it, and I felt as if quitting meant I didn’t appreciate them the way I should have. Despite that guilt, I couldn’t hide that I just wasn’t looking forward to choir anymore. And once I was able to admit that, it seemed like it should’ve been easy to leave the choir behind. So why was I having such a hard time making this decision? 

“I felt as if quitting meant I didn’t appreciate them the way I should have.”

Rebecca Hendrix, LMFT, helped me unpack that. As I described my dilemma, Hendrix noticed that this was more than a mild case of indecisiveness. I was judging myself, terming myself a “quitter” and allowing that declaration to color how I thought about myself. 

She suggested a reframing of my decision from one that condemns change to one that celebrates my ability to listen to my needs, both now and in the past. When I started choir, I was listening to my needs at the time: More social interaction, a new routine to soften my depression, a return to more musical roots. Now, I have different needs: More downtime during the week, and space for more spontaneity, should I want it. 

While quitting felt so negative to me at the time, I now realize that the ability to let go of a hobby is just as vital as taking the leap to start one. But acknowledging that is one thing. How do you actually do it? 

Accept that you won’t be 100% certain 

We’d all like to be unflinchingly sure of the decisions we make, but that’s not the reality. That tug in the other direction, that gray area that never seems to settle into black or white, can cause us not to act on very real feelings. But as it turns out, being uncertain about something and doing it anyway, that is where progress is made. 

“We’d all like to be unflinchingly sure of the decisions we make, but that’s not the reality.”

Being a marriage and family therapist, Hendrix remarked on her experience with couples, saying, “I can’t tell you how many couples walk down the aisle, feeling like they should be 100% like, ‘This is the best day of my life, I’m absolutely certain this is the best person for me.’ They’re not. But they walk down the aisle anyway, and they have a very healthy, long-term, successful relationship.” 

Certainty can be comforting, but it can also make us more rigid than we need to be. Uncertainty just means that thing you’re quitting is nuanced — not all good, not all bad. 

Listen to your gut, but don’t judge it

If you’re feeling like you might want to quit something, there’s probably a reason. Whether it’s dread, boredom, burnout, or some cocktail of the three, those are flags worth paying attention to. Your job is to give those signs a nod, without slipping into judgment. 

“If you’re feeling like you might want to quit something, there’s probably a reason.”

Hendrix gives the example of choosing to end a friendship. “Someone might ask, what does it mean about me that I don’t want to be friends with this person anymore? Well, I make it mean that I’m not kind. Can I forgive myself and say that just because I’m not going to be friends with that person doesn’t mean I’m not kind?”

She calls this a self-honoring choice, one where you resolve not to draw conclusions about your character based on a single decision. We can apply this to everything, including the hobbies we choose to step away from. 

“She calls this a self-honoring choice, one where you resolve not to draw conclusions about your character based on a single decision.”

Okay, so what if it’s something more important than a hobby? What if you’re volunteering for a cause where people depend on you? Isn’t it selfish to quit in that case? 

Hendrix says no. “It’s not selfish, it’s self-honoring to take care of myself first. Because if I do, I’m going to have more to give.” 

It all comes back to the ever-evolving nature of our needs. Just because you commit to volunteering in one period of your life doesn’t mean you have to do that forever. And it also doesn’t mean that the time you did show up is worth less because you didn’t stick with it. 

Your hesitancy to quit might be exactly why you should

If you’re reading this, you’re probably someone who makes decisions methodically. That doesn’t mean you break out a pros and cons list to buy a new pair of jeans (though if you do, I would not judge it). But you’re less impulsive when it comes to the way you distribute money, time, and energy. 

“We’re hard-wired to persevere, to follow through, even when it’s inconvenient.”

That’s a good thing! We’re hard-wired to persevere, to follow through, even when it’s inconvenient.

Your hesitancy to quit means that you’re a thoughtful person who makes grounded decisions. And sometimes the best decision is to grant yourself the fluidity to let go of a hobby, rather than digging your heels in as if to say, “I planned to like this, so I have to like it.” 

Just because you quit something doesn’t mean you can’t come back to it

Viewing my decision as permanent is what made it stressful for me. I felt like I was operating within some kind of “The Little Mermaid” logic: You can trade your tail for legs, but you have to give up your voice forever. 

Again, it comes back to self-judgment, or even the judgment you imagine others are casting on you. Those people stuck with choir, those people aren’t quitters, those people are better at balancing life than I am… the list goes on. 

“It comes back to self-judgment, or even the judgment you imagine others are casting on you.”

Chances are: No one is analyzing your decision that deeply. If you take some time off from a hobby and decide to go back to it, no one is going to think that you’re lesser for it. 

You shouldn’t either.

Olivia Macdonald is a NYC-based writer. Her advertising work for clients like the Harris-Walz campaign and the state of Connecticut have been featured in AdWeek and AdAge, but more importantly, have been a big hit in the family group chat. You can read more of her writing in her newsletter, om nom, and on her website.

The post How I Learned That “Quitting” Isn’t Always A Bad Thing appeared first on The Good Trade.

My husband turned to ask me if we should invite everyone over for an early dinner. I wanted to spend as much time as possible with everyone, especially those who lived far away, so the answer was obvious even though this would mean throwing an impromptu dinner party for thirty people. 

“The answer was obvious even though this would mean throwing an impromptu dinner party for thirty people.”

We let those we could know in person to come by around four, and asked them to text the ones we hadn’t been able to touch base with to spread the word. On the way home we swung by the store, grabbed a couple of bags of pasta, one gluten free alternative, and a whole bunch of vegan sausages. We went home to do what we could to prepare.

We pulled out any spare chair or stool we had, put two huge pots of water on to boil, dumped two or three jars of sauce into their respective pots once the noodles had cooked and set out several large baguettes next to the butter dish. Thoughtful guests who had a chance to run by the store brought bottles of wine. When they arrived, we instructed everyone to grab a plate and let people know where they could find the glassware so they could help themselves.

Anyone who was able-bodied and under the age of fifty sat on the floor, leaving the seats for the likes of my grandma’s generation, which included my 88-year-old grandfather, two of my great uncles, and two great aunts. My grandmother was the first of their generation to go, and this was the first time my generation would grieve someone we’d grown up making memories with. I was very aware that this was the beginning and the end of an era.

“I was very aware that this was the beginning and the end of an era.”

One of the things I remember most about that night was my mother and one of her first cousins sitting on the rug, legs folded to their chests and plates atop their knees, giggling and clinking their glasses. I couldn’t help but think this was the best possible way to close out the day of my grandma’s funeral — a woman who had gathered all of us so many times before and had hosted countless dinner parties over the decades.

Another especially meaningful gathering that comes to mind is my husband’s 34th birthday. To mitigate our guests’ wide array of dietary needs, we invited each group or pair to bring a dish of their choosing. That night we ate vegan tacos, enjoyed an artfully curated charcuterie plate, and a traditional Middle Eastern dish called makloubeh that is cooked in a huge pot and served only after a climactic move that requires the server to flip the enormous dish upside down and hope that the rice doesn’t spill everywhere (the flip was a success — we have a video!).

After we ate, we headed out back to sit around the fire pit, as usual. Everyone had seconds and thirds, smoked hookah, and laughed into the night. The meal was a rich mish-mash, the evening a hodgepodge — just like us.

“The meal was a rich mish-mash, the evening a hodgepodge — just like us.”

Perhaps my favorite, though, was the time we hosted forty people at our house for Thanksgiving. We still lived in that same two-bed, one-bath house that was built in 1920 — arguably too small to host a large group of people. Modern amenities were few and far between. But she had character for days, and we had a really long driveway that inspired us to set up the longest table we possibly could and invite everyone who could come.

And they did. We filled the table to the brim. We rented linens and chairs and dishes, and everyone brought an entree or a side. One of our dearest friends filled vases with foraged blooms from the neighborhood and made personalized name cards. Another brought his turntable and made it his job to keep the music going. 

The people who came spanned four generations, several different family trees, and folks drove in from the desert and up from San Diego. I remember both ends of the long table were reserved for our two guests in wheelchairs. I remember missing my grandpa, who had died just a few months before, and really wishing he was there. I remember my daughter, not even a year old, wearing a red corduroy jumper, the youngest at the table. 

The candles burned all the way down, surrounded by half-empty glasses, wine stains, and the general mess of a well-used tablescape after everyone has finished their meal. Most people stayed well into the night, and I remember at one point capturing a video through the back window of a handful of men gathered around the fire, laughing. I knew this was it — the thing we’re all always chasing. Connection and community.

“I knew this was it — the thing we’re all always chasing. Connection and community.”

We woke up the next morning to the leftover mess in the backyard. Our friends who had spent the night helped us clean up. Our daughter played while we did so. It occurred to me that this was her very first Thanksgiving, and what a Thanksgiving it was.

To be honest, our great big Thanksgiving dinner wasn’t exactly within our budget. And often hosting more people than we planned isn’t. I’m certainly not advocating for financial irresponsibility, but my point is we’ve never once regretted the splurge.

Now it’s old hat, second nature for us to invite our friends and their kids for a post-nap run around the backyard and casual dinner parties. If capacity allows (emotional, physical, or otherwise), we pivot to add one more to the table, one more to the calendar, one more evening to our rolodex of priceless memories with the ones we love.

Kate Arceo is the Community Manager at The Good Trade. She has a Bachelor of Science from Evangel University and has over 5 years of experience reviewing sustainable home and lifestyle brands, as well as organic kids’ apparel and nontoxic cosmetics. When she’s not hosting dinner parties with her husband at their home in Southern California, you can find her sipping a latte at their local coffee house or shopping for strawberries with her kids at the farmers market. Say hi on Instagram!

The post The Case For Hosting (Even If You Don’t Have The Perfect Home) appeared first on The Good Trade.

In my practice as a functional medicine doctor, we often talk about food as medicine, movement as medicine, and sleep as medicine. But gratitude? Gratitude might be one of the most underappreciated forms of medicine of all.

“Gratitude might be one of the most underappreciated forms of medicine of all.”

When we practice gratitude, something profound happens: Our nervous system softens, our heart rate steadies, and our brain begins to rewire itself toward safety and connection instead of vigilance and stress. That single moment of thankfulness ripples outward — lowering cortisol, balancing hormones like serotonin and melatonin, improving digestion, and even supporting deeper, more restorative sleep.

The research is clear: Gratitude doesn’t just make you feel better. It changes you on a cellular level. 🫶

How gratitude rewires stress hormones

Let’s start with a simple but confronting question: Are you more often grateful, or chronically stressed?

Usually (and I mean no shade when I say this), we don’t need practice in being stressed. But we do need practice — and reminders — to make gratitude a habit that lasts longer than November.

Chronic stress keeps the body in a perpetual state of “fight or flight.” Cortisol rises, heart rate quickens, and your system stays on high alert, constantly scanning for the next demand. Over time, this wears on your biology. Your stress response becomes dysregulated, hormones lose rhythm, and symptoms like fatigue, anxiety, poor sleep, and inflammation begin to appear.

“When the body feels safe, healing, hormone balance, and true rest finally become possible.”

Gratitude, on the other hand, sends the opposite message. It tells your body, you’re safe now. And when the body feels safe, healing, hormone balance, and true rest finally become possible.

Thankfulness works like a counterbalance. When you intentionally shift your attention toward what’s good — a moment of laughter, a sunrise, a warm meal — your brain releases dopamine and serotonin, the same neurotransmitters that elevate mood and build emotional resilience. Studies show that consistent gratitude practice can lower cortisol levels by up to 23%, improve heart rate variability, and even reduce inflammatory markers like C-reactive protein (CRP).

In short, gratitude helps regulate the very systems that stress disrupts — your hormones, your sleep, and your sense of inner calm. It doesn’t erase life’s challenges, but it gives your body a way to respond to them with steadiness instead of survival.

The hormonal ripple effect

Your hormones respond directly to your emotional environment. When stress dominates, cortisol suppresses reproductive hormones like estrogen and progesterone, disrupts thyroid function, and interferes with blood sugar balance. Gratitude acts as an antidote to that spiral.

But it’s not just about thinking grateful thoughts — it’s about feeling them. There’s a somatic difference between saying “I’m grateful” out loud and actually pausing long enough to sense gratitude in your body. That felt awareness — the warmth in your chest, the breath that deepens, the shoulders that drop — is what tells your nervous system you’re safe.

“There’s a somatic difference between saying “I’m grateful” out loud and actually pausing long enough to sense gratitude in your body.”

When your body perceives that safety and connection, oxytocin (the “bonding” hormone) rises, cortisol lowers, and your parasympathetic nervous system — the “rest and digest” mode — comes online. You digest better, your cycle steadies, your energy stabilizes, and your immune function improves.

The simple act of feeling what’s going right, even for a few seconds, creates a cascade that supports hormonal balance from the top down.

Gratitude and sleep: Why it’s easier to rest when you’re thankful

One of the most beautiful (and practical) effects of gratitude is how it supports sleep.

Studies from UC Davis and the National Institutes of Health have found that people who regularly express gratitude fall asleep faster, sleep longer, and wake up feeling more rested. Why? Because gratitude decreases rumination — the anxious, looping thoughts that keep us wired late into the night. Thankfulness is a powerful pattern interrupt for anxious thoughts that keep us wired into the night.

“When you consciously focus on what you’re thankful for, your brain shifts activity from the amygdala — the fear center — to the prefrontal cortex, the area linked to emotional regulation and calm.”

When you consciously focus on what you’re thankful for, your brain shifts activity from the amygdala — the fear center — to the prefrontal cortex, the area linked to emotional regulation and calm. This shift activates the parasympathetic nervous system, lowering heart rate and blood pressure and signaling safety to the body.

Thankfulness also boosts serotonin, a neurotransmitter that not only lifts mood but helps regulate melatonin — the hormone responsible for maintaining healthy sleep cycles. Research has shown that people who keep gratitude journals report lower nighttime cortisol and improved heart rate variability (HRV), a key marker of nervous system balance.

When you end your day by acknowledging what you’re thankful for, your brain begins to associate bedtime with safety and contentment rather than unfinished tasks or worries. It’s like a grown-up version of counting sheep, except it works by calming your biology.

Gratitude prepares your body for rest in the most natural way possible. It’s a practice that quiets the mind, regulates the hormones that govern sleep, and reminds your body that it’s finally safe to exhale.

How to build a gratitude practice that actually works

Gratitude doesn’t have to be grand or performative. It doesn’t require a journal, a perfect morning routine, or an inspiring sunrise. What matters most is consistency — not just checking in once at the end of the day, but weaving thankfulness into small, ordinary moments. The kind of gratitude that changes you is really just the practice of slowing down enough to feel what’s good.

Because gratitude isn’t just a mindset; it’s a physiological experience. When you let your body register safety, pleasure, or appreciation, even for ten seconds, you’re training your nervous system to recognize calm instead of chaos. Over time, that shift helps move your baseline from stress to steadiness.

Here are a few simple, science-backed ways to make gratitude stick:

• Habit stack it. Anchor gratitude to something you already do, like your morning coffee, commute, or brushing your teeth. Repetition helps your body feel safe in routine.
• Make it sensory. Instead of “I’m grateful for my health,” try “I’m grateful for how strong my legs felt on this morning’s walk.” Tangible details activate the parts of your brain linked to emotional regulation and reward.
• Share it out loud. Expressing gratitude to a partner, friend, or even a stranger increases oxytocin, the hormone that fosters connection and trust. And if it’s part of your spiritual practice, speaking your gratitude out in prayer can do the same — deepening both peace and presence.
• Catch it in the moment. Gratitude isn’t something you have to save for later; it’s something you feel as it’s happening. Think of it as your conversation with life. Notice the warmth of your coffee, your child’s laughter, the quiet between tasks. These micro-moments are where your nervous system learns to rest.
• End the day with it. Before bed, name three moments that went right. This lowers nighttime cortisol and signals to your body that it’s safe to rest.

Gratitude isn’t a thought exercise, but more of a full-body practice. The more you allow yourself to feel it, the more your body learns what peace actually feels like.

When things are hard

Gratitude isn’t about pretending everything’s fine when it isn’t. It’s about finding small anchors of light when life feels heavy. During difficult seasons, your brain’s negativity bias becomes stronger — it’s wired to scan for danger and protect you from further pain. That’s survival.

“Gratitude isn’t about pretending everything’s fine when it isn’t. It’s about finding small anchors of light when life feels heavy.”

But intentionally practicing gratitude, even for a few seconds a day, can shift your brain’s focus from threat to possibility. Research from UCLA shows that regularly acknowledging what you’re thankful for activates the medial prefrontal cortex, the area of the brain linked to emotional regulation and resilience. Over time, this changes how you process stress — not by erasing pain, but by strengthening your ability to move through it.

In somatic terms, gratitude helps the body remember safety. When you whisper “thank you” through tears or exhaustion, your nervous system gets the message: You’re still here, you’re still safe, and there is still good.

Gratitude doesn’t deny hardship; it helps your body metabolize it. It’s not about spiritual bypassing or toxic positivity. It’s about presence — allowing both grief and grace to exist in the same breath. Because sometimes the most profound gratitude isn’t loud or joyful. It’s quiet. It’s what gets you through.

The everyday medicine of gratitude

Gratitude isn’t something we save for the holidays or practice only when life feels good. It’s a daily rhythm that does your mind, body, and soul a lot of good. Thankfulness is a way of steadying ourselves in a world that moves too fast and asks too much.

“Thankfulness is a way of steadying ourselves in a world that moves too fast and asks too much.”

When practiced consistently, gratitude reshapes the body’s stress response, steadies hormones, and helps the nervous system rest. It’s one of the simplest, most profound forms of medicine we have — free, accessible, and backed by science.

The world constantly pulls us toward what’s missing, but practicing gratitude brings us home to what’s already here: our breath, our people, our bodies, and the quiet, ordinary miracles of being alive. ✨

Dr. Jaclyn Tolentino is a Board-Certified Family Physician and the Lead Functional Medicine Physician at Love.Life. Specializing in women’s health and hormone optimization, she has been featured in Vogue, The Wall Street Journal, and Women’s Health. As a functional practitioner and a breast cancer survivor, Dr. Tolentino is dedicated to uncovering the root causes of health challenges, employing a holistic, whole-person approach to empower lasting wellbeing. Follow her on Instagram here for more insights.

The post The Science Of Gratitude: How Thankfulness Transforms Your Hormones, Stress, And Sleep appeared first on The Good Trade.

“I recall the cool, crisp air rising off the ice rink at Rockefeller Center and brushing my face while I watched the skaters.”

Fast-forward to grown-up life, with its accompanying pressure to make the holidays memorable. Whether it’s finding the perfect gift, making the best cookie ever, or decorating to the max, we strive to create Hallmark moments rather than savoring our actual experiences with mindful attention and intention. We may spend so much time imagining how we’d like things to go in our heads that we miss what’s going on in our lives — for example, baking cookies with your son or daughter and focusing on how they turn out, but not the magic of the moment with your child. Or, spending days preparing a meal for your holiday guests only to discover that by the time they show up, you feel depleted and don’t enjoy the meal.

As a psychologist, I’ve heard from so many clients about the difficulties this season brings up. As we head into the season, I wanted to share some thoughts on how to remain present, even as the holidays shake up our routines and stir up feelings and stress. 😌

What is presence?

For me, being present means being fully engaged in the moment, losing track of time. Some people call it “being in the zone.” When was the last time you were in the zone? What did it feel like? What were you doing? For most of us, it’s very gratifying and fulfilling to be in the zone, although it’s often challenging. So, if presence feels good, why don’t we do it more?

“For most of us, it’s very gratifying and fulfilling to be in the zone, although it’s often challenging.”

Simply put, because the environment we’re living in is designed to distract us. The average person is exposed to hundreds or even thousands of commercial messages every single day. Whether we’re on our laptop, desktop, phone, or iPad, everyone is trying to capture our attention. When was the last time you were in your car and got to your destination without noticing your route along the way? Or someone was speaking with you, and you didn’t hear a word they said? Or you ate your meal, and you didn’t taste it? One of these probably happened to you once or more in the past week.

Despite practicing mindfulness for the past 15 years, I still experience many “mindless” moments when my life is happening. That’s because it takes practice.

Being present is possible but not easy

Even with an environment filled with distractions, we can learn to practice presence. The more we put our attention and intention on the moment we’re in, the stronger our “presence muscle” becomes. Since the experience of being present to a positive or neutral event is accompanied by feeling good, this will make our behavior of “being present” more likely to occur again. Over time, this becomes more automatic and can develop into a habit that offsets our tendency to be distracted both externally with the messages that bombard us daily, and internally with our own thoughts and feelings.

“The more we put our attention and intention on the moment we’re in, the stronger our ‘presence muscle’ becomes.”

For the last 4 years, I’ve been participating in a 5K walk/run in Springfield, Missouri on the first Saturday in November. Usually, I’m preoccupied with thoughts and fears about whether or not I’ll complete the course, but this year I focused on noticing and savoring my experience. Let me describe exactly what I mean. Instead of worrying about how far I had to go, I paid attention to the sights, sounds, and other sensations around me.

It was a crisp fall morning with the sun just coming up as we started. I could hear the other participants happily chattering and the sound of athletic shoes striking the pavement. Bystanders cheered and rang cowbells when we came by. I saw the changing fall colors on the trees and the rustling of their leaves. The sky was clear, and the temperature gradually warmed the further we walked and ran. I could feel my cool, steady breath moving in and out of my body. Tuning into my senses helped me relax and enjoy my experience, rather than focusing on and worrying about how far I had to go. 🏃‍♀️

Body-centered practices to rediscover and reclaim presence

Over the years, I’ve developed a mindful stress reduction program that I call “Stress Less Live Better.” I start with three body-centered practices: In Simply Breathe, the object of attention is your breath, and the intention is letting go. In Soothe Your Body, the object of attention is your body, and the intention is to pay attention. In Savor the Moment, the object of attention is your five senses, and the intention is savoring your experience.

“When your attention starts to stray, and it probably will, just gently and lovingly bring it back to your breath without judgment or self-criticism, as it flows in and out.”

My program starts with these three body-centered skillsets because it’s easier to get out of our heads when we’re focusing on our bodies. We start with breath since it occurs effortlessly without us having to do anything. I tell my students: When your attention starts to stray, and it probably will, just gently and lovingly bring it back to your breath without judgment or self-criticism, as it flows in and out.

Pairing this with attention to what I see as the four pillars of health — sleep and rest, exercise, nutrition, and stress reduction — will ensure you have a good baseline to begin.

How to be mindful during the holiday season

Now that your body is starting to settle down, it’s time to put your rational mind back in the driver’s seat. Research indicates that we spend 80% of our time worrying about the future, 20% regretting the past, leaving little time in the present moment. During a stressful time like the holidays, we’re even more prone to drift from our present.

I frequently collaborate with Cristle Griwach, M.A., M.F.A., an experienced health educator, advocate, and health literacy expert. Together, we developed these six tips to quiet your emotional brain and re-engage your rational mind during this time of year:

1. In any season, gratitude is a helpful mindfulness practice. At the end of each day, think of three things you are grateful for. You could start a holiday gratitude journal or just make a mental list at the end of the day. The benefit of writing it down is that the list will help you preserve the memories. I find that looking back at what I was grateful for last week makes me happy all over again.

2. Over the years, I have learned to keep the holidays simpler, and I like it. Instead of too much holiday decor and too many presents, I decorate minimally, with intention, and limit presents to a few. My family enjoys this simpler routine that more closely mirrors the calmness and serenity of winter. We would rather fill up on experiences than things we probably don’t really need.

There is a wonderful Victorian tradition for filling children’s stockings that works as a gift guide for adults, too.

“Something to eat;
Something to read;
Something to play with; and,
Something they need.”

3. This is a great time of year to contact old friends. You could even mail out actual holiday cards, or digital cards, email, or make a phone call. Connect with friends and family and share memories together.

4.  Engage in creative activities that you enjoy. Some people like to decorate cookies or wrap elaborate packages. If that’s not for you, try coloring, holiday decorating, or journaling. Whatever you enjoy. Throughout the year, I save clever craft ideas and then select a few to try during the holidays. It can be something as simple as a new way to wrap a package.

5. Make time to appreciate how much you have learned and grown this year. Look back on challenges you have met, skills you have learned, and obstacles you overcame. I bet that if you think about it, you will be pretty impressed with yourself. So, hats off to you!

6. Finally, treat yourself by doing something special just for you. It could be as simple as listening to your favorite holiday song, getting a manicure, or phoning a friend. Whatever you do, make it about you. By prioritizing self-care, we remind ourselves that we deserve to enjoy the holidays just as much as anyone else.

Once you’ve practiced being “present” during the holidays, keep this tradition alive throughout the year. Celebrate yourself and your life unfolding moment to moment. Not only is our presence a gift to our loved ones, but it is also a present to ourselves. Enjoy!

Dr. Diane Sanford is a women’s health psychologist specializing in empowering women through every stage of life. For 35+ years she has prescribed self-care and mindfulness to guide her clients towards inner peace and self-awareness. To achieve clarity and balance in her own life, her self-care and mindfulness practices include yoga, meditation, walks in nature, reading, cooking, spending time with loved ones, and playing with her 20-month-old grandson, Cameron. You can visit her at drdianesanford.com.

The post How To Experience The Holidays With Presence appeared first on The Good Trade.

On a day many of us consider the junk drawer of the week, Sunday is seen differently by communities that observe the Sabbath. For instance, in Loma Linda, CA, the community takes a nonnegotiable day of soaking up rest and joy each weekend, and according to research, alongside diet and exercise, this ritual of relaxation helps them live ten years longer than the rest of us. 

“What if I told you you could add ten years to your life by doing nothing?”

Loma Linda is one of five globally recognized regions of exceptional longevity, known as a Blue Zone. Largely made up of Seventh-day Adventists, Loma Linda actually sets apart their Saturdays as a devoted act to keeping the Sabbath — a Biblical tradition where observers take 24 hours each week to worship and rest. But the outcomes of their practice show us the importance of taking a day of rest.

Dr. Dan B. Allender, author of “Sabbath: The Ancient Practices,” describes the Sabbath as an invitation to “feast, play, dance, have sex, sing, pray, laugh, tell stories, read, paint, walk, and watch creation in its fullness.” It’s a gift to be opened every weekend like clockwork.

No work, no chores, no catch-up. Just delicious delight. 

“No work, no chores, no catch-up. Just delicious delight.”

So, while most of us are piling up our weekends with leftover tasks we couldn’t get to midweek, the residents of Loma Linda are retelling their favorite stories, taking long naps in the grass, and living to see an extra decade because of it. 

But in our productivity-obsessed world, carving out an entire day purely for rest sounds like a ridiculous luxury. When social media works with hustle culture, we’re made to feel like we’re chronically behind. Every free moment is a chance to catch up to the pace of everyone else as the prevailing message rings, “I can rest when I’m done (or dead).” 

But Oliver Burkeman, author of “Four Thousand Weeks,” says our culture is racing against a rigged clock: “Becoming more efficient just makes you more rushed, and trying to clear the decks simply makes them fill up again faster […] The day will never arrive when you finally have everything under control.”

Productivity content like the Sunday reset trend on social media doesn’t help us realize the cost of our hurried, hyper-efficient way of life. Sure, watching creators deep clean their toilets and sanitize their shiplap coffee tables is a mesmerizing internet rabbit hole. However, Sunday resets run the risk of reinforcing that “always behind” message, robbing us of what Loma Linda calls creating “a sanctuary of time” with the tool of rest. 

“Sunday resets run the risk of reinforcing that ‘always behind’ message, robbing us of what Loma Linda calls creating ‘a sanctuary of time’ with the tool of rest.”

Taking a page out of Loma Linda’s book, I started toying with the idea of unplugging and giving a whole day to simply lingering in delight, creating my own “sanctuary of time.” So I swapped Sunday resets for a rest day, and while there’s no way to know if it’s extended my life by a decade, I can say confidently that it’s changed it forever.

Here’s what happened.

I was ironically more productive.

Choosing to take 24 hours a week for nothing but delight didn’t make the chores and weekend to-dos disappear. Things still needed to get done. However, I found that when I chose to set aside Sundays for rest, not only did I enter my week more restored, but I subconsciously began to make it a point to tackle tasks like grocery shopping, cleaning, and meal prep on days I was already in go-mode. 

Knowing I had a day of full decompression ahead helped me preserve the time I needed to. I avoided putting off my practical responsibilities midweek. The structure instead lit a fire underneath me to carve out small chunks of time to get chores done and out of the way so I could sink fully into my day of rest to come. 

“Knowing I had a day of full decompression ahead helped me preserve the time I needed to.”

While my midweek results are not always on the level of a Sunday reset, I realized that what’s truly important tends to get done eventually. 

By taking a day of rest, whether or not everything on my to-do list is done, I’m engaging in a courageous act of detangling productivity from my self-worth. I am learning to prioritize living a present life over a perfect one. In her book, “The Gifts of Imperfection,” Dr. Brene Brown urges, “If we want to live a Wholehearted life, we have to become intentional about cultivating sleep and play, and about letting go of exhaustion as a status symbol and productivity as self-worth.”

This doesn’t mean I never do laundry again. It means I rethink and restructure my weekly load to address the most important things first. I might get less done overall, but I’m forced to assign importance, letting the rest fall to the wayside and realizing maybe those things weren’t that important after all.  

I learned what rest meant to me.

What’s restful for one person can be draining for the next, and it took rounds of trial and error to discover what was refreshing for my unique mind, body, and soul. 

For example, a day packed with social engagements can be energizing for some, while for others, it depletes them of energy. 

“A day packed with social engagements can be energizing for some, while for others, it depletes them of energy.”

Taking note of the activities that, when they ended, I felt energized, inspired, and at peace continues to be helpful in determining what to do on my rest days and what to avoid. 

Similarly, giving myself time to get lost — in a creative project, a book, or a research itch — is a treat for the brain as I allow myself to linger and luxuriate in what’s caught my interest. With no work to get back to, I put no time limit on engaging in delight for as long as it lasts, and as a result, I’ve found rest days move along slower, sweeter, and more restorative. 

I learned how to listen to my body.

My biggest challenge in incorporating weekly rest days was slowing down enough to enjoy them. 

In the quiet of a do-nothing day, pent-up stress from the week would amp up in my body, making me antsy and making me reach for distractions like scrolling mindlessly or falling down internet rabbit holes that passed the time but were joyless in the end. 

After a week of go-go-go, my body remained in hyperactive mode, urging me to dispense that frenzy energy. I needed to learn how to decelerate my internal world long enough to step into a slower pace of delight.

“I needed to learn how to decelerate my internal world long enough to step into a slower pace of delight.”

In their book, “Burnout,” Amelia and Emily Nagoski share that “For some of us, it’s been so long since we listened to our bodies, we hardly know how to start understanding what they’re trying to tell us, much less how to trust and believe what they’re saying. To make matters worse, the more exhausted we are, the noisier the signal is, and the harder it is to hear the message.”

In the same way, I needed to set my schedule to support my day of rest; I needed to put my mind and body to receive the rest. 

I incorporated journaling techniques like brain dumps and using a voice note on my phone to process everything swimming around in my head externally. That way, I give my brain time to acknowledge what’s happening inside, giving the thoughts somewhere to live outside my mind and body. 

In addition, I work to move any pent-up energy in and out of my body with a yoga practice at home, a walk in the morning, or a little dance break — whichever feels the most joyful that particular day. 

I learned how to notice.

A ritual of rest became life-changing when it helped me slow down enough that I began to notice small, profound details of my life I’d been overlooking. 

I now notice how shadows change shape on the sidewalk when I’m going for a stroll, how the first sip of coffee differs from the next, and I hear the soft, familiar scratches of my favorite record playing when I sit down to read. 

“I tell myself throughout my rest days that my only job is to notice.”

In the rhythm of slowing down, the practice of noticing has made space in my mind to wander, contemplate, and take a breath as I take in my world afresh each week. I tell myself throughout my rest days that my only job is to notice. In the famous words of Ferris Bueller, “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.”

As a result, the art of noticing has bled into the other six days of my week, stretching my capacity to catch those fleeting, rich details of life that make it worth living, and I’m left more grateful, grounded, and present because of it. 

When I began swapping productivity-driven Sundays for rest days, I wanted to discover if the long-lasting folks of Loma Linda were on to something. I found a ritual of making room in my schedule to decelerate, notice, and soak in joy set me up for more peace in the six days that followed than dust-free shelves and plumped pillows ever could. Sure, a rainy Sunday vacuuming and Windexing your mirrors is satisfying in its own right, but I found that making space for a day that doesn’t involve productivity is pretty life-changing.

“Life is worth living as presently as possible.”

Life is worth living as presently as possible. Incorporating a ritual of weekly rest is a surefire way to slow down, open up, and enjoy it abundantly. 

What gets in the way of resting regularly? How have you found ways to decompress, manage your stress, and find peace in your weekly schedule? Share your thoughts in the comments! 

Cheyanne Solis is a copywriter relieving entrepreneurs to rest and invest more in what they love. She writes on practical wellness and mindful productivity from the perspective of sustainable work-life balance. Explore her work and connect here.

The post Instead Of A “Sunday Reset,” I’m Embracing Rest appeared first on The Good Trade.

“Grandma hobbies are gaining in popularity precisely because people are craving hands-on activities that don’t involve looking at a screen.”

When asked why grandma hobbies are taking off so dramatically, Shelly Dar, a mental health and wellbeing specialist in the UK who describes herself as a Nani (grandma) first and a therapist second, says, “We’re overstimulated and under-nourished in ways that matter. There’s also a longing for tangible skills that feel real and useful. In an economy where so much work feels abstract or precarious, being able to grow your own tomatoes or mend your own clothes is grounding.” Dar adds, “And honestly, we’re lonely. These hobbies connect us to generations before us and give us something to share with people around us now.”

The buzzy term “grandma hobbies” refers to a wide umbrella of activities. There are fabric and needle-based crafts such as sewing, knitting, crocheting, embroidery, and felting; paper-based crafts like scrapbooking, drawing, painting, and even letter-writing; nature-based activities like bird-watching and gardening; kitchen arts like cooking, baking, canning, pickling, bread-making; less “productive” activities like jigsaw puzzles and board games… It doesn’t really matter what the activity is as long as it involves your hands, deep focus, patience, and no screens (except for when you’re learning the skill, though you could also take an in-person class or use a book instead of YouTube).

“It doesn’t really matter what the activity is as long as it involves your hands, deep focus, patience and no screens.”

I’m a fairly scattered person in general, so right now I have several grandma hobbies and other hands-on activities on the go: a felting project, a crochet project, an embroidery project, plus I’m learning how to do Reiki — which, while not a traditional grandma hobby, does involve my hands, focus, patience, and no screens. I also enjoy the mindfulness involved in cooking a meal from scratch, and I’ve been trying to journal more. I find all of these incredibly compelling, so much so that I often wish I were doing them during the workday. As corroborated by the scientific evidence, grandma hobbies unsurprisingly make me feel calmer and more centered, as well as giving me a sense of accomplishment.

“Grandma hobbies give us a feeling of slowing down, coming back into our bodies and minds, and taking time to regain perspective on our lives and priorities,” says author and psychotherapist Eloise Skinner. “Grandma hobbies can also seem nostalgic (perhaps reminding us of our own grandparents) — a factor that is often strong during times of uncertainty or instability, and can also provide a sense of counter-cultural rebellion. And, of course, if grandma hobbies are trending, more people are likely to try or join in, especially if the trend is picked up on a wider cultural level.”

Another clear benefit of spending my time on activities like these has been relearning…well, how to learn. I dislike being bad at things, so learning a new skill is difficult, but I’ve been pushing myself through that discomfort with patience, determination, and a sense of acceptance that I won’t be the best at everything I do (or indeed anything I do). I don’t always manage it, but when I do, I can feel the benefits of really treating these hobbies like a discipline. It’s been a powerful antidote to the instant rewards technology provides.

What does science tell us about grandma hobbies?

Grandma hobbies feel good; anyone who’s ever tried them can tell you that. But if, like me, you’re someone who has to know exactly how things work, you’ll also be interested to know just how much science backs up the benefits of these hobbies. 

“From a therapeutic standpoint, these activities are genuinely regulating for the nervous system,” explains Dar. “The bilateral movement in knitting or kneading dough, the sensory input of soil or yarn, and the predictable rhythm all signal safety to our bodies. They activate the parasympathetic nervous system, which helps us rest and digest rather than stay in fight or flight.”

“The bilateral movement in knitting or kneading dough, the sensory input of soil or yarn, the predictable rhythm all signal safety to our bodies.”

– Shelly Dar, mental health and wellbeing specialist

And we don’t have to rely on anecdotal evidence to verify the truth of this. “Studies on knitting have shown it reduces anxiety and chronic pain, with effects similar to meditation,” says Dar. “Gardening has been linked to lower cortisol levels and improved mood.” Like knitting, crochet is positively associated with stress reduction and pain management; jigsaw puzzling may apparently protect from cognitive aging; bird-watching has been shown to promote wellbeing. There are similar studies showing the benefits of pretty much any grandma hobby you can think of, including scrapbooking, cooking, board games and arts and crafts generally.

“What I see in my practice is that these hobbies give people a sense of accomplishment that isn’t tied to productivity in the capitalist sense,” says Dar. “You finish a row, you harvest a pepper, you pull bread from the oven. That hits differently than checking off a work task. It’s satisfying in a bone-deep way.” Plus, Dar says, these activities also create pauses throughout the day, and therefore build in permission to rest. “You have to wait for dough to rise or plants to grow,” she says. “That enforced slowness is medicine for people who’ve forgotten how to rest without guilt.”

How to take up a grandma hobby:

I get it. With all the responsibilities already on your plate, it can definitely be really hard to take up and stick to a new hobby — my roughly 17 unfinished projects and I relate. But if you do choose to pursue a grandma hobby, “start slow and consistent — even 5-10 minutes a day could be a good way to begin a new hobby routine,” says Skinner. “Since grandma hobbies reward full present-moment awareness, try to find times where you can immerse yourself fully (for example, working on a crafts project before bed, or spending a short time in the garden in the mornings).” It’s about finding a hobby that lights you up, and which is also practical to keep within your existing schedule.

“It’s about finding a hobby that lights you up, and which is also practical to keep within your existing schedule.”

Also, as I’ve learned the hard way, it’s so important to do your best to let go of perfectionism. “Start small and let it be imperfect,” says Dar. “You don’t need the fancy yarn or the perfect garden plot. Bake one simple recipe. Plant three herbs in a pot. Learn one basic stitch. The point isn’t mastery, it’s the doing.” She also suggests building these hobbies into your life as it is, like knitting while watching TV or tending to your plants while sipping your morning coffee.

While it’s obviously possible to learn and practice grandma hobbies alone, Dar reminds us not to forget about the power of community. “If possible, learn from someone who already does it,” she says. “Ask your grandmother, your neighbor, someone at a community garden. These hobbies were always meant to be passed hand to hand, and that exchange is part of the healing.”

Here are some grandma hobbies to get you started

It’s never been easier to start a hobby. You can pick up an embroidery or crochet beginners’ kit from any craft store in your area, or take up an activity that uses material you already have — pots and pans, pen and paper. There are YouTube videos out there to learn how to get started in every skill under the sun, or you can seek out courses, or groups, online or locally. And let’s not forget the power of learning from books, either! If you have kids in your life, you’ll know how important that is. For each activity below, I’ve listed one resource to help you get started, but there are so, so many more out there.

1. KNITTING. Using two knitting needles and yarn to create a textile — and ultimately, a piece of clothing or toy. Beginner tutorial here.

2. CROCHET. Using a crochet hook and yarn to create clothing, toys or home decor. Beginner tutorial here.

3. EMBROIDERY. Using a needle and thread to create patterns and drawings on embroidery hoops or any piece of fabric or clothing. Beginner tutorial here.

4. NEEDLE FELTING. Using a felting needle and wool to create toys and decorations. Beginner tutorial here.

5. SEWING AND DRESSMAKING. Using a needle and thread or sewing machine to repair existing clothing and create new clothing. Online course here.

6. SCRAPBOOKING AND COLLAGE. Crafting with photos, mementos, colored and patterned paper, stickers, washi tape, etc. Inspiration here.

7. PAINTING AND DRAWING. Doodling also works! It doesn’t have to be good. Online course here.

8. LETTER-WRITING. A great antidote to texting fatigue. Learn calligraphy to get fancy.

9. COOKING. Making everyday dinners, meal-prepping, or entertaining. In-person cooking classes near you.

10. BAKING. Experimenting with sweets, savory pies and homemade breads. Cake-baking troubleshooting.

11. CANNING. Preserving jams, sauces, pickles and other recipes in sterilized, air-tight jars. Easy and fun recipes here.

12. BIRD-WATCHING. Spotting common and rare birds in your local area and beyond. Bird-watching guide for North America.

13. GARDENING. Tending plants in your garden, on an allotment, or in your home — from succulents to pumpkins and anything in between. A beginners’ gardening guide.

14. JIGSAW PUZZLES. Testing your patience and letting yourself do “unproductive” activities. A modern jigsaw brand we love.

15. BOARD GAMES. Board games have often been relegated to the realm of younger children and older adults, but the rise of board game cafés around the world shows there’s an appetite for them among us all — and there are some really fun ones these days, too, not just Scrabble and Monopoly. Plus, unlike many other grandma hobbies, board games are by nature a social activity. A two-person board game to try.

16. BRIDGE AND OTHER CARD GAMES. Bridge is a popular card game among older generations, and although it hasn’t quite taken among younger people yet, it’s focused, fun, and encourages socialization. Or you could try solitaire. Find a bridge group near you.

Grandma hobbies are a powerful practice to integrate into our lives. They require us to slow down, show ourselves what we’re capable of, and exist outside of the treadmill of productivity we’re all on. “In my work as both a therapist and a Nani, I’ve watched people literally soften as they reconnect with these practices,” says Dar. “Their shoulders drop. They laugh more easily. They remember that they’re allowed to make things just because it feels good.”

It’s time we reclaimed the hobbies our ancestors knew were important, for our own good and the good of those around us. “Every stitch, seed, or slice is a reminder that we don’t have to earn our rest or our joy,” says Dar. “We can just claim it, one small human act at a time.”

Iris Goldsztajn (she/her) is a freelance writer and editor based in London, UK. Her work has been featured in British Vogue, Marie Claire, Refinery29, SELF, Bustle and many more. Iris can typically be found on her way to a fitness class or with her nose in a good book.

The post Why “Grandma Hobbies” Are Good For You — And 16 Activities To Try appeared first on The Good Trade.

Our team has extensively researched dozens of tiny home companies for high quality and affordable prefab, DIY, and custom builds — these are our top picks that are on sale.

After a few years of being faced with the importance of our homes — how they feel, and where they are — the tiny house movement continues to gain momentum. We are full supporters of this creative, efficient, eco-friendly living solution (many of these homes can be constructed specifically to exist off the grid).

Tiny house styles, sizes, and features vary widely depending on your needs, and can even match a range of budgets. And you don’t even have to take the plunge all at once — it’s common to invest in a tiny home as a vacation getaway or rental. You can also give a tiny home a spin for the weekend through Getaway, a tiny house vacation rental company.

Why are tiny homes trending? 

Tiny homes are gaining popularity—and for good reason! These minimalistic homes are a great choice for simple living, due to their smaller square footage and low cost investment. These homes are also mobile, meaning you can be flexible where you’d like to set up your space and you won’t be tied down to a certain spot.

Many tiny homes also have in-depth customization options so you can design your home to fit your exact needs (some even offer luxury amenities!). This also makes them a great choice to invest in and rent out for additional passive income or for those who love frequent scenic change. Using a tiny home as a guest house for friends or family if your property allows it is also a popular way of utilizing a tiny home to create more value out of your space. Most importantly, tiny homes use fewer resources to build, and require less energy to heat up and cool down, meaning you can majorly reduce your carbon footprint! 

How much does a tiny home cost?

Depending on the type of tiny home you’re looking for, costs will vary. For a more affordable option, DIY kits can range from $10,000 to $20,000 for a simple design. According to Rocket Homes, a stationary prefab tiny home can range anywhere from $35,000 to $68,000, while a mobile prefab tiny home averages between $60,000 to $80,000. Custom builds have the largest range, and can start anywhere from $25,000 up to $200,000 and beyond depending on the square footage of your desired tiny home. 

Other financial considerations may include costs when it comes to financing your tiny home.  Many tiny home companies offer financing when purchasing your tiny home, whether a personal loan or a tiny home loan if available. Similar to buying a traditional home, you will often need to put a down payment and provide proof of income. Insurance is also required in order to protect your tiny home, and fees may vary based on the location of your tiny home 

Ultimately no matter which type of tiny home you go for, you will be saving lots of money compared to running a traditional house (and you’ll be helping our planet at the same time)!

Our criteria:

• QUALITY MATERIALS | We’ve carefully selected tiny home companies that are built with high quality materials and intentional craftsmanship to ensure the integrity and durability of your long-term home investment. 
• AESTHETICS | Each of these homes suit a variety of aesthetics, whether you’re looking for modern luxurious fixings, a natural rustic feel, or a cozy home vibe. 
• AFFORDABILITY | This guide showcases tiny homes for a wide range of budgets, including ones on sale—meaning you will find a home that works for your wallet! 

If you’re ready to simplify your whole living space and save energy and money, a tiny home might just be perfect for you. You can build your own using tiny home plans — check out Etsy’s selection or our list of the best tiny home plans (that come complete with materials lists!), or select a prefabricated house from the brands below. Each one is dedicated to quality control, consistency, craftsmanship, design, comfort, and eco-friendly practices — so go on, find the (tiny) home of your dreams.

Once you’ve found your dream tiny home and are ready to move in, be sure to reference our guides on the best sustainable furniture, decor, and organic mattresses for inspiration on furnishing your new space.                            

P.S. For more mindful living inspiration, sign up for The Daily Good, our free daily 30-second newsletter!

Best Overall | Most Affordable | Best Tiny Home Kits

1. Tumbleweed

American made

Recycled materials

Best For | Green Certified tiny house RVs
Price Range | $85,000–$125,000+
Ships To | Continental USA

Tumbleweed lives and works by the mantra, “Dream Big, Go Tiny!” The company started in 1999, and is now the largest manufacturer of tiny house RVs in North America. Tumbleweed’s dedication to craftsmanship, innovation, and customer satisfaction makes them industry-leading designers. While working with this team, you’ll receive extensive feedback sessions and the assurance of RVIA certification. The brand even has 20 locations of tiny house hotels across the US so you can try out a Tumbleweed for yourself!

2. Tiny Cocoons

Family owned

Recycled materials

Small business

Best For | Sustainable & environmentally friendly homes
Price Range | $51,500–$225,000+
Ships To | USA

Tiny Cocoons is a team of architects, designers, and specialists bringing your minimalist dreams to life with tiny homes (some including wheels!). They’re specifically made to be energy efficient, use recycled natural materials, and can be equipped with composting toilets or solar-powered electric systems — it’s all up to you! Choose from Tiny Cocoons’ five base models or custom-design your own for up to eight people. You can even instantly download construction plans for a backyard build of your own for $159.

3. New Frontier

American made

Small business

Best For | Luxury minimalist tiny homes
Price Range | $150,000–$235,000+
Ships To | USA (Including Hawaii)

New Frontier believes that great design and quality housing should be affordable and attainable for everyone. With over 40 years of building and design experience, the company’s goal is to help improve lives by supporting economic freedom, intentional living, and sustainability by designing and building the best custom and luxury tiny homes in America. These tiny homes can be RVIA & PWA certified for additional fees.

4. Home Depot

American made

Recycled materials

Best For | Backyard offices & extra room
Price Range | $8,400–$63,500+
Ships To | USA; check shopping cart for details

If you’re looking for greater shipping availability (and again, don’t mind putting in a little work), Home Depot sells a range of kits. From small, no-floor poolhouse units to fully insulated and installed sheds you can use as a backyard office, Home Depot is a good option for adding more indoor space to an existing property. It’s also handy since many places in the US have a Home Depot nearby in case you need extra tools, supplies, or advice!

5. Jamaica Cottage Shop

American made

Budget friendly

Small business

Best For | Affordable tiny cabin pre-cut kits
Price Range | Varies; roughly $5,000–$70,000+
Ships To | Continental USA & Eastern Canada

If you’re looking for a more affordable option and you’re ready to put in some work, consider a pre-cut kit from Jamaica Cottage Shop. The kits come prepared with everything you’ll need, except the tools and the location! (Some plans are even for tiny houses on wheels, so location isn’t as important.) This Vermont-based company delivers kits for free within a 300-mile radius of their headquarters (as well as fully constructed homes!) so be sure to check if you’re local. And if you’re homesteading, you can also find sheds, coops, greenhouses, and more at Jamaica Cottage Shop!

6. Studio Shed

American made

FSC

Recycled materials

Best For | Backyard studio sheds & accessory dwellings 
Price Range | $20,100—$119,000
Ships To | USA & select locations in Canada & the Caribbean

If you’ve ever envisioned turning your backyard into an inviting oasis, Studio Shed’s tiny homes are right up your alley! Designed to last a lifetime, each Studio Shed home is built with high quality materials, is completely customizable, and can be installed in a matter of days. Alongside making your backyard more livable, Studio Shed is committed to sustainable initiatives including sourcing FSC-certified wood and operating a recycling program at their production facility. Re-define your living space and craft out the backyard of your dreams!

7. Wheelhaus

American made

Recycled materials

Small business

Best For | Non-mobile modular tiny homes for any climate
Price Range | $149,000–$174,000+
Ships To | Continental USA

Wheelhaus wants you to live large with less. This company’s style harmonizes rustic and modern trends inspired by the durability of log cabins, featuring high ceilings, oversized windows, and eight-foot doors. You can even add an outdoor deck! These high-end modular homes can endure hurricane winds and heavy snowfalls, and are delivered conveniently to your property in the continental US. Every Wheelhaus home comes with High R-value energy-efficient insulation, too, and exceeds the requirements for the US Green Building Council Gold standard.

8. Mint Tiny Homes

Family owned

Best For | Move-in ready tiny homes delivered to Canada & US
Price Range | $87,208–$114,323+ ($114,900 CAD–$153,600+ CAD)
Ships To | USA & Canada

Tiny living has been gaining popularity in Canada in recent years, and brands like Mint prove that our northern neighbors have got this lifestyle perfected. Mint prioritizes coziness, without sacrificing function, quality, or sustainability in the process. These tiny homes come turn-key ready, which means they have all the basic working appliances and hookups you’ll need, plus you can opt for off-grid readiness if you’re ready to go for things like full solar and composting toilets. The homes are made in Vancouver, and ship all across Canada and the USA.

9. Escape Traveler

American made

Recycled materials

Best For | Completely electric tiny homes (eModels)
Price Range | $37,556–$99,015+
Ships To | Continental USA

Escape Traveler designs focus on letting sunlight in, so you always have a feeling of openness in your small space. With panoramic windows, large bedrooms, washers & dryers, storage, climate control, full kitchens, and more, you’ll unavoidably fall in love with your new home. These tiny houses are made for extreme climates, and they’re hand-crafted in the company’s RVIA-certified plant. Take a look for yourself — it’s clear why Forbes calls Escape Traveler homes “the most beautiful tiny houses in the world.” If you’re somehow not sold yet, check out their Escape Vacations and try a unit for yourself!

10. Tiny Heirloom

American made

Family owned

Best For | ADU-certified tiny homes for full time living
Price Range | $65,000–$145,000+
Ships To | USA & Canada, can ship overseas

Tiny Heirloom is putting homeownership in reach with these smartly designed tiny homes for individuals, couples, and families. This company’s modern homes can be customized to fit your needs and design preferences, and they come in a wide range of sizes (and even two-stories). Tiny Heirloom also offers in-house financing, delivery, and accepts cars and RVs for trade-ins. Not sure which of the models to choose? Take a virtual tour of the website before you buy! You can also find pre-loved homes through Tiny Heirloom as well.

11. Tiny House Listings

American made

Small business

Best For | Existing tiny homes to buy or rent
Price Range | Varies; typically starts at $30,000
Ships To | Select locations across North America

Founded in 2010, Tiny House Listings is one of the world’s leading online marketplaces for small and tiny homes. The easy-to-navigate online platform serves as a trusted marketplace for people to sell, buy, and rent tiny houses and properties worldwide. Everyone can use it, and you’ll find millions of posts and listings to browse through, which you can then filter by budget and preferences. (And take it from us, this is the perfect place to browse even if you’re just daydreaming about your tiny house escape.)

Psst! Google launched a new feature that lets you choose “Preferred Sources” — so your searches highlight trusted, values-driven outlets instead of clickbait. To add The Good Trade, tick the box beside our name. That’s it — our stories will be waiting whenever you search. Read more about it here.

The post 11 Prefab Tiny Homes For Sale So You Can Buy Prebuilt appeared first on The Good Trade.

Not everyone lives in the autumn capital of the world like I do, but having a cute fall has nothing to do with how orange the leaves in your neighborhood are! Everyone can achieve a fall aesthetic no matter where you are — all it takes is some inspiration. 

Think of the classic fall setting of the town of “Stars Hollow” from “Gilmore Girls” — warm, deep hues, pumpkins, leaf garlands, cozy sweaters, and leather jackets. Adding these elements to your daily routine can help you get into the fall spirit! Activities like leaf peeping can also help you embrace fall nature from a new perspective. Achieving the autumnal aesthetic you’ve been craving is easier than you think!

Here you’ll find nine ways to curate your perfect fall — what to cook, how to decorate, what to read, and things to do. For more fall inspo, read up on the garments you’ll find in our fall capsule wardrobe this year, and these 99 ways to slow down for fall.

1. Feast on fall food

Probably the most satisfying way to ring in the season is to cook something delicious! Maybe you have a favorite autumn baked good — while I do love a good pumpkin muffin, these pillowy pumpkin cinnamon rolls are on my radar this year (the gooey cinnamon filling and melty cream cheese frosting look divine). I’m planning on gifting a tray of these to my neighbors and friends for a yummy and thoughtful autumn pick me up!

I’m a sucker for pumpkin spice coffee, so I like to make my own pumpkin cold foam with maple syrup to throw in my pour-over every morning — although I will go to Dunkin Donuts on the first chilly morning of September and get a pumpkin spice iced coffee, just to make sure it still tastes the same! Chai has also been a go-to fall drink for me — nothing hits better than a steamy cup in the morning or adding a shot of espresso to make it dirty!

One of my favorite fall activities is heading to the farmers’ market for in-season ingredients — for me, that means lots of root veggies like carrots and sweet potatoes, plus all kinds of squash, corn, and apples. I try to plan my meals around what I can grab at the market.

After pumpkin creamers, pies, and any other concoctions, I use the leftover can of pumpkin puree (that inevitably ends up in my fridge) by dumping it into a curry with cubed potatoes and butternut squash, or — hear me out — mixing it into a cheese sauce for a deliciously warm and creamy one pot pumpkin mac and cheese.

2. Add fall colors to your space

Fall decor shouldn’t mean buying a bunch of new decorations that’ll end up stored in a closet for 10 months a year. The best fall decor is anything you can buy from the farm (or from the front of the grocery store!) — pumpkins, gourds, dried corn. I use sugar pumpkins so I can cook them when they’re done sitting out on the front stoop, and the gourds can go in the compost in December.

Fresh flowers in warm colors do the trick, too. Look into some local flower producers near you and shop from them as much as possible, and throw the flowers into repurposed spaghetti jars or second-hand vases. Thrift stores and apps are also great for finding pretty new pots, jars, or wooden decor.

3. Incorporate cozy fall textiles in your home

Don’t underestimate the power of textiles! I put orange textured pillow covers on throw pillows and make sure I have lots of cozy blankets around. My favorite type of blankets are the chunky knit ones as the thick, knotted structure screams fall, especially in shades like beige, mustard yellow, or rusty red. (Bonus if it’s a weighted blanket — it feels like the perfect warm hug on a chilly fall evening!) Sometimes, I’ll also switch out regular dish towels, placemats, and napkins for something bright and kitschy. And we can’t forget the floors — a nice, plush, area rug in velvet, plaid or tartan can sometimes be all you need to truly transform your space into a fall revel!

Texture isn’t only limited to the fabric pieces in our home. Adding wicker or woven storage baskets adds the much-needed autumn charm, plus they’re perfect for storing those blankets when not in use. I also love switching out my silverware for copper-toned ones for that extra rustic oomph.

4. Fill your home with fall scents, sounds, & lighting

Of course, nothing sets a fall mood quite like a candle (or five). To reduce waste, I like to make my own candles. Sites like Makesy make it easy to buy soy wax, wood wicks, and mix-and-match fragrances. I make a big batch of warm spicy candles each fall, then use those same jars to make a new collection of floral candles each spring. My go-to fall scents usually involve some combination of cinnamon, vanilla, amber, patchouli, and sandalwood. If you prefer scenting your space without candles, essential oil diffusers are a great choice as you can switch out the oils to match the mood and season as you’d like!

Speaking of candles, lighting is truly everything! If fall time in your area consists of bright and sunny days, it doesn’t mean you still can’t bring the snug, homey vibes of fall into your home. Candles can definitely up the ambiance, as well as adding fairy lights to your home or backyard for that amber glow. Adding warm-toned drapes or curtains, and switching out the bulbs in your home to warm-tone lighting is another way to add a seasonal fall aura to your space. Personally I never use my overhead lights, rather I use lamps for that cozy, mellow vibe. And if you have a working fireplace, what better time to break out the lighter and set the mantle!

While I don’t have a fireplace in my space, one of my favorite and easiest things I love to do is play the sounds of crackling fire or some coffee shop jazz while I work. Playing songs that get you in the fall spirit is a must and is probably the easiest way to embrace the season. These songs are a for sure way to get in the fall mood: “Roslyn” by Bon Iver and St. Vincent, “Sweater Weather” by The Neighborhood, “Autumn in New York” by Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Armstrong, and “There She Goes” by The La’s. 

5. Break out your fall wardrobe

Pulling out sweaters and jeans on the first cool day inaugurates the official start of the season for many. If you need to add to your wardrobe this year, check out secondhand shops in your community or this guide to thrifting online. If you’re buying new, check out our guide for sustainable sweaters, or consider one of our favorite fall trends: Sustainable cowgirl boots.

Most importantly — dress how you feel most comfortable! It doesn’t get cold everywhere in September and October. Maybe your fall means you can wear short plaid skirts outside comfortably. I’m jealous! Head to Pinterest if you need fall fashion inspiration for warm climates, like striped rugby shirts and suede skirts. (Preppy or chic western anyone!?) 

6. Explore where you live

Get outside and explore where you live this fall, whether that means visiting your favorite farm for a hayride, hiking through nature, or just getting downtown to a bookstore. 

If you can, plan a day or two to go somewhere you’ve never been. Look for county fairs, fall festivals, or Renaissance fairs near you, or go to a local brewery or cidery. Maybe you head to a new-to-you nature preserve or grab your pumpkins from a different farm this year. The perfect fall Saturday sometimes involves seeing where the day takes you.

Here’s a tip: Apple picking doesn’t have to be a requirement.

7. Spend time with loved ones

My most cherished autumn memories have always involved other people — carving pumpkins with friends, visiting a fair with my family, watching fall movies with my partner. 

You can put on the most perfect fall outfit to go sip a PSL under a brilliantly orange tree, but the moments you’ll remember won’t be the ones you did for the ‘gram. I don’t remember what scent I used for my candles last fall, but I remember giving my friend a pumpkin beer for the first time and making the ugliest sweet potatoes I’ve ever seen for a potluck. Spend time with people you love this season, whatever that looks like for you.

8. Slow down and embrace the season

Savor the slowing down of the season. The packing in for winter, the shortening days, the quieting. As the air grows and your social calendar cools down, maybe you take this time to work on slowing down your thoughts by journaling or practicing gratitude, or maybe you finally try out therapy. 

Maybe slowing down means you take up a new hobby you’ve been meaning to try — knitting, canning, soap carving — you name it. Leaf peeping has also been popping up lately and is the perfect way to appreciate the fall foliage in all its glory. This guide can help you locate where you can find the most spectacular fall foliage in your state.  

You can also slow down by brewing some piping hot tea, lighting a candle, and settling in with a book or a favorite movie. There’s hardly a better (or easier) way to set the autumn mood. Some evenings, I even love to jump on Tumblr or Pinterest and beam fall imagery into my brain.

9. Immerse yourself in fall with books & TV

Fall wouldn’t be complete without the coziest TV shows! A few of our personal favorites include “Gilmore Girls”, “The Wrong Paris”, “Chilling Adventures of Sabrina”, “Wednesday”, and “Virgin River” (all of which are on Netflix). If true stories are more your thing, check out this list of docuseries on Netflix.

Some classic fall movies we watch year after year are “When Harry Met Sally”, “It’s the Great Pumpkin”, “Charlie Brown and A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving”, “Hocus Pocus”, “You’ve Got Mail”, and “The Nightmare Before Christmas”. Other fall options include “Knives Out”, “Practical Magic”, and the entire “Harry Potter” series.

If you’re a reader, immerse yourself in a fall book — anything by Donna Tartt (“The Secret History”), Shirley Jackson (“The Haunting of Hill House”) or Ray Bradbury (“Something Wicked This Way Comes”) does it for me. Moodier options might be “The Picture of Dorian Gray” by Oscar Wilde or “Northanger Abbey” by Jane Austen, and cozier reads include “Arsenic and Adobo” by Mia P. Manansala or “Autumn” by Ali Smith.

Natalie Gale is a Boston-based freelance journalist. When she’s not writing about art, food, or sustainability, you can find her biking to the farmers’ market, baking, sewing, or planning her next Halloween costume. Say hi on Instagram!

The post 9 Ways To Create The Perfect Fall Aesthetic appeared first on The Good Trade.

Essentially, it feels as if my personal space (energetic, physical, and yes, metaphorical), gets crowded before my eyes.

“It’s an energetically porous stretch of weeks where boundaries blur, emotions rise, and overstimulation creeps in.”

Like many sensitive people, I’ve come to recognize this time of year as something more than just “spooky season.” It’s an energetically porous stretch of weeks where boundaries blur, emotions rise, and overstimulation creeps in — not only from the external world, but from the energetic residue of others. As a naturally open person, I’ve had to learn (and re-learn) how to protect my emotional energy this time of year. Because protection, I’ve found, isn’t a one-and-done act. And most importantly, this ongoing process can be done gently.

This guide isn’t about shutting yourself off or becoming rigid. It’s about cultivating spiritual and energetic protection while still honoring your softness, intuition, and openness. To help explore this nuanced balance, I spoke with three intuitive practitioners — psychic Crystal Fawn, energy healer Kesaine Walker, and certified guide Holly Harnsongkram — about how to approach emotional protection as a sacred and sustainable practice during the spooky season.

Why the season can feel so overstimulating

Autumn, especially in the northern hemisphere, carries a particular charge. “It’s a very wacky mix of both frenzy for the harvest and stark realism,” says Fawn. “We end up being excited and scared at the same time, which leaves us feeling a bit tapped out.”

In addition to the external shifts (like cooler air and shorter days), there’s the internal pressure that comes with this season’s cultural and spiritual symbolism. “The collective focus on the supernatural tends to open up an energetic field,” explains Walker. “For empaths or highly sensitive people, that means the chances of picking up psychic debris from others and the environment are higher.”

“In addition to the external shifts (like cooler air and shorter days), there’s the internal pressure that comes with this season’s cultural and spiritual symbolism.”

Harnsongkram adds that it’s not just spooky media or social pressure that heightens this intensity. In fact, it’s the thinning of our own energetic boundaries. “Energetically sensitive people have often withdrawn their energy in response to past trauma,” she offers. “So their aura is closer to their physical body, which is why they feel more affected and drained by other people’s energy.”

Color me intrigued. This makes so much sense in terms of the feelings I experience at the turn of fall.

What emotional protection *actually* means

Emotional and energetic protection isn’t about cutting yourself off from the world. Instead, it’s about intentionally managing your energy, so you’re not constantly absorbing everything around you.

“It’s about intentionally managing your energy, so you’re not constantly absorbing everything around you.”

“Energetic protection is about clearing yourself and creating a safe container,” says Walker. “It’s taking the time to tend to your inner garden. It’s all about keeping your frequency clean.” Likening my energy to an inner garden? That’s beautiful and easy for me to envision maintaining my energy as a process. After all, plants need tender care and ongoing maintenance or tune-ups. 

She goes on to add that it means incorporating tools from the elements. “Breath and prayer for ether, smoke or music for air, salt baths or ocean dips for water, grounding through nature for earth, and candles or visualization for fire,” says Walker. “Each element brings you back to center without hardening your heart.”

Harnsongkram agrees, noting that trauma-informed energetic protection is rooted in restoring the flow of your energy field — not just building walls or keeping yourself enclosed. Through practices like Life Activation or intentional rituals, she says, empaths can “re-establish their natural energetic flow” and strengthen their aura over time.

So, how do you begin? It doesn’t have to feel like a big undertaking. Fawn encourages people to start with clarity and permission: “Try putting up Out of Office notices,” she suggests, either literally or through visualization. “Then slowly allow stuff back in when you feel ready. Usually what happens during OOO time is that we remember how being alone (energetically or otherwise) has its own limitations too, and we start to reassess the value of ‘letting other people’s energy’ mix with our own.”

Signs you might be absorbing too much

Before we even get to rituals or remedies, it helps to recognize the signs that your energetic field may be overextended. These signs can be subtle and so easily dismissed.

“You might feel heavy, foggy, or emotional for no reason,” says Walker. “Or it could be physical: tightness in the chest, tension in the gut, or a sudden dip in energy.” She suggests simple interventions like rinsing your hands, moving your body, or doing a smoke cleanse. “Low vibrations can’t hold onto high frequency.”

“It helps to recognize the signs that your energetic field may be overextended. These signs can be subtle and so easily dismissed.”

Other markers that might metaphorically pop into your days differently. Fawn adds that even mundane tasks can become red flags. “Picking a playlist, deciding on meals, sketching out a schedule; all of these things start to feel completely overwhelming. Which I think is normal and totally okay! But usually a sign that the call is coming from inside the house,” she says. Her favorite trick? A New Age energy-clearing ritual that uses physical gestures and deep breathing to help you assess whether the energy you’re feeling is yours or someone else’s.

Harnsongkram offers an additional layer of insight: You may find yourself thinking thoughts that don’t feel like your own. Or reacting to food prepared by someone in turmoil. “We also take in energy through food,” she notes. “So if something feels ‘off’ in your body, trace it back… you might be absorbing more than you realize.”

Spiritual tools for protection and grounding

Each of the experts emphasized that spiritual protection works best when it becomes a regular rhythm — like brushing your teeth, but for your aura. Here are a few favorite tools and rituals you can try:

Visualization & Energy Work

• Fawn: Visualize “Out of Office” signs. Meditate with clear quartz in your left hand and a dark grounding crystal in your right. Use prisms in your space to shift energy.
• Walker: Use the “sword of light” or “golden sieve” visualizations to cut cords and filter dense energy. Imagine yourself inside a glowing crystal chamber to recharge your aura.
• Harnsongkram: Engage in rituals that expand and strengthen the aura, ideally passed down through sacred teaching.

Elemental Cleanings

• Walker recommends incorporating the five elements: “Breath and prayer for ether, smoke or music for air, salt baths or ocean dips for water, grounding through nature for earth, and candles or visualization for fire”
• Fawn swears by salt in the bath at the end of the day.

Energetic Hygiene Practices

• Mix in daily affirmations. Try “I am safe, I am clear, I am sovereign,” says Walker.
• Checking in with your energy before and after social events.
• Avoiding “energetic commitments” that you haven’t explicitly consented to.

Protecting yourself without closing off

The heart of emotional protection isn’t about isolation or only saying no. This practice is about integrating discernment into your decision-making and your intuition.

“Just because someone drops their energy in your lap doesn’t mean you have to sort through it,” says Fawn. “If it’s too much, you’re allowed to toss it right out the window. Managing your own energy first isn’t selfish; it’s essential maintenance”

Walker echoes this, too. She reminds readers that sensitivity is a form of strength. “Being sensitive to energy and seasonal shifts is a gift that just needs maintenance,” she says. “The more you cleanse, ground, and protect yourself, the more magnetic your energy becomes”

“You are allowed to protect your softness. You can honor your openness and your need for peace.”

And if you take only one thing from this guide, let it be this: You are allowed to protect your softness. You can honor your openness and your need for peace. You can opt out of overstimulation without opting out of connection.

This season, let your boundaries be sacred, your rituals be nourishing, and your energy be your own. 🫧

Stephanie Valente is a Contributing Editor at The Good Trade. She is a copywriter and editor covering wellness, commerce, lifestyle — and more — for publications like Brooklyn Magazine. Based in Brooklyn, she’s often writing poetry, getting lost in a book, or hanging out with her dog.

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